The Myth of Ozzie & Harriet

by Rory Bowman
Opponents of Washington's domestic partnership law like to tell fairy tales about Ozzie and Harriet, going so far as to use the image from this 1950's comedy to disparage what they call "non-traditional" families. That most real-world families do not match this model is irrelevant, as is the fact that both David and "Ricky" Nelson went on to divorces themselves. They use weasel words to mention "thousands of studies that show negative outcomes for children that are denied both a mother and father," but fail to note that many of those studies are addressing cases where one parent is a drug addict, alcoholic, physically abusive, imprisoned, dead or in cases of incest, abandonment or other family-court intervention. The ideal of two parents who marry once and then never divorce is seldom met, even in the most "conservative" of churches.

Since most domestic partnerships involve people over fifty and do not include households with children, the entire issue is something of a red herring. Domestic partnerships do not inherently affect children any more than they command the schools to teach that sexual activity between senior citizens is "normal and natural," but what are the real studies on children who grow up with one or more same-sex partners as parents?

The vast majority of research shows that a stable and loving home is the important thing, whether that home is created with a "blended family," by adoption or with an extended family which may include childcare from seniors or same-sex domestic partners. The conservative group NARTH, which actively encourages therapy for "unwanted homosexual attraction" cites a study which shows clear positive differences in children raised by lesbian or gay couples, with males showing more nurturing behaviors and females more likely to have "higher aspirations to occupations that are not traditionally female," such as public safety and science. The American Psychological Association has a free PDF which outlines research on gay and lesbian parents, which shows similar positive outcomes, especially when compared to children growing up in foster homes, shared-custody divorce situations or a single parent. WebMD addresses the same issue and shows similar positive outcomes:

Researchers looked at information gleaned from 15 studies on more than 500 children, evaluating possible stigma, teasing and social isolation, adjustment and self-esteem, opposite gender role models, sexual orientation, and strengths.

Studies from 1981 to 1994, including 260 children reared by either heterosexual mothers or same-sex mothers after divorce, found no differences in intelligence, type or prevalence of psychiatric disorders, self-esteem, well-being, peer relationships, couple relationships, or parental stress.

"Some studies showed that single heterosexual parents' children have more difficulties than children who have parents of the same sex," Perrin says. "They did better in discipline, self-esteem, and had less psychosocial difficulties at home and at school."

Another study of 37 children of 27 divorced lesbian mothers and a similar number of children of heterosexual mothers found no differences in behavior, adjustment, gender identity, and peer relationships.

Although supportive, two-parent households are strongly correlated with child health and positive social outcomes, the gender of parents does not seem to be the case. It is the presence of multiple loving adults that makes life better for children, not the presence of adults with specific genitals.

For many years the family courts in Washington and elsewhere have recognized the value of a stable home environment for optimal development of young people. One parent is better than no parent, and two parents are better than one parent, if a home is stable and free of violence. A key goal of stable marriages and domestic partnerships is the provision of stable homes for families of all kinds: young or old, gay, lesbian or straight.

Be they biological, blended, adopted or court-assigned, parents are the main thing that helps to raise healthy children, which is presumably why Larry Stickney has married three times. Protect all families by approving Referendum 71 to support registered domestic partners here in Washington state. Not all of Washington's 6000+ domestic partnerships involve children, but for those which do this is important.

Ozzie and Harriet were good parents, who raised good children. Other parents and children should have the same opportunities. Protect all families by approving Referendum 71.